I have always been a journaler. I have written off and on throughout my entire life. I am currently re-reading my old journals for a writing project that I am working on and in doing so, I found my journals from the few years just prior to my very first SVT episode.  As I scoured those tender pages, with the gift of hindsight knowledge, I got a real glimpse into exactly what I was going through prior to the onset of my SVT and just how little I was speaking my HEART TURTH or even knew what that really was… 

My observations confirmed my theory about SVT; that SVT is a health issue that arises from a combination of factors and root causes. These factors culminate, over time, to create the perfect storm of SVT. I believe those root causes are physical + nutritional, emotional+ mental, energetic + spiritual. While I discuss  the power of changing our diet, and doing everything we can from a nutritional perspective to help ourselves, I am only beginning to share the depths that I believe that emotional wounding and thus emotional healing can have on our suffering and capacity to heal our SVT.

I also believe that the way we view our SVT, (our perception of it), is the difference between being a victim of SVT or our initiation into becoming empowered and entering self-responsibility, the true beginning of any self-healing journey.  SVT is our crossroads. Both our view of it and response to it, dictates our future experience. We have a choice in how we navigate our SVT. As we learn to both hear + then fully express our heart truth, will enable this process with ease or resistance.

As I re-read my old journals, some of the themes that came up for the 1-3 years prior to SVT reflect the amount of resistance I exuded to my life experiences and my resistance to follow my heart (or even really connect with it for that matter. Thus, the manifestation of my difficulty in my life and that ultimately led to a physical health issue. I was IGNORING all the signs that I believe happen prior to a health breakdown. As Oprah says, the Universe whispers and when we ignore it, it gets louder and louder. I believe SVT is a “louder” way of our heart getting our attention.

Here are some of the things I can clearly see in hindsight in re-reading my old journals, that preluded the onset on my SVT, and display the disconnection to my heart truth and ability to speak and express it in my life.

  • DEPLETION– I was utterly exhausted. I was endlessly working excessive long hours, and staying up late every night, sometimes working til 3-4am. And all for a boss that didn’t appreciate it anyway. I was constantly PUSHING myself and depleting my energy. I was not protecting myself and setting boundaries. (This was a long held energetic pattern I was raised with, taking on too much, and goes back to childhood when I was forced to deal with too much at too young an age) BUT I didn’t realize this pattern until 20 years later hence. Please read more about Default energetic patterns HERE and watch this video HERE.
  • I had major boundary issues– I was unfulfilled at my job as a Fashion Designer in NYC. I didn’t like working for an over re-active, unappreciative, verbally abusive boss and yet I accepted my stressful job and the way I was treated as “normal”. I could never stand up for myself, ask for the raise I deserved, or the assistant I needed, or the treatment I deserved. I never left work on time to purse my personal life, I blamed my boss, and was “passive aggressive” about it, rather than standing up for myself. I did not have the skills to set the boundaries with my boss, stand up for myself, or leave an abusive environment.
  • Self-Neglect and Ignoring my needs-I desperately craved time off, more time to myself in general, restorative practices that I NEVER made time for, and nourishing foods that I had “no time” to cook. There was a general lack of connection to my own needs and a constant ignoring of my true needs and desires. I wasn’t making space to nurture or nourish myself.
  • I had MIGRAINES-My body was crying out for help for years prior to SVT with other symptoms such as migraines, constipation, hemorrhoids, rashes, anxiety and panic attacks. I never got to the ROOT of those issues, and just lived my life sort of “used to them” and suffered through it,  (which is why they progressed and culminated into something that actually would finally demand my attention like SVT).  Migraines, panic attacks and SVT also all have similar physical + nutritional root causes; such as undiagnosed food allergies and sensitivities, leaky gut syndrome and over-burdened lymphatic systems.
  • Lack of Spiritual Connection-I did not have spiritual practices and consistent routines that could have supported my efforts to HEAR my INTUITION more clearly or access the advice and direction that I so deeply longed for.
  • Ignoring my own INTUITION- Because I didn’t have the solid connection to my intuition that I craved, when I did have internal guidance, I didn’t respond to it. I ignored it when it did speak to me.
  • SEEKING LOVE and FULFILLMENT outside myself- It was a little cringy to read just how much I wrote/dreamt about romantic love. To say I was searching for love or my soulmate, or dream/fantasy scenarios would be an understatement. Further, I was way too crushed when someone didn’t love me back. It was just so painfully evident to me now as I re-read those pages,  that what I was desperately searching for then, could only be found by looking within. Until you create and develop a GOOD relationship with yourself, we are never going to find this from someone else. So obvious I know, but I wasn’t practicing that.  I was in desperate need of self-LOVE. I know now that self-love is cultivated by engaging in consistent self-healing practices and learning how to hold space and compassion for ourselves, this was a process and Im so grateful I know this now.  If I could back in time and give myself any bit of advice, it would be to spend time on caring about what I wanted, what I liked, and forging a relationship with myself to get to know myself, instead of constantly wondering and worrying about finding romantic love. Choosing ME over any other relationship, was the message I missed.
  • Self-hatred-This one is a combination of constantly talking to myself harshly or critically, and re-cycling negative emotions over and over again without knowing how to hold space for myself  to RELEASE emotions thru self-compassion. OMG. YES!
  • Unhealed Childhood WOUNDING-My sacred wounds were ever present, just under the surface, dictating every scenario I attracted. I wish I explored this more or had the guidance on how to do so. Inner child healing work is such a massive part of healing our heart wounds and one of my FAVORITE types of healing work to guide people through today. I needed this then, and now, and it’s an ongoing process.
  • Unhealthy relationship with Food-Eating poorly- and constantly, constantly  craving SUGARY, EASY, CARB DENSE foods plagued me along with overeating, binge eating, binging and purging, and soothing with food overall was a major theme in my life. I had all of it, never got to the root of it, and all of those things are SVT triggers.  (To learn more about food and the SVT+ Gut connection read The SVT Prevention DIET HERE) 

In summary, I can identify in hindsight, the obvious ways that the disconnection from my heart truth was playing out in the experiences that I was attracting in my life.

Instead of taking time pursue my spirituality and ground myself into healing practices that I was fully committed to, I immersed myself in coping strategies. I was a work-alholic, I was a binge eater. I was obsessed with love and other things outside of own internal landscape. My career and relationships were built on trying to be things that I wasn’t. I was always  trying to prove myself, striving instead of being. And Living a life of “TRYING” is exhausting and depleting. (depletion is the foundation for SVT). All of my experiences were reflections of how I felt about myself and sadly back then I didn’t have the understanding yet of how The Law of Attraction was playing out in my life. I was driven by trying, proving, exerting, instead of being, allowing, and connecting. (By the way those are masculine energy qualities and there was no understanding of the divine feminine energy, that is the healing yin energy, we so desperately need for balance.)  In Chinese medicine, SVT is called Heart YIN deficiency. Overall, I had no idea what it meant to HOLD SPACE for MYSELF or how I was constantly making decisions from a place of fear and disconnect, instead of from a place of peace, flow, and heart connection.

Proving yourself worthy, working overtime, allowing abuse, PUSHING yourself, exhaustion and disconnection from your heart, are  ALL fuel for SVT. 

It’s NO WONDER I developed a Heart Chakra ISSUE.

My heart, my symptoms and my experiences were all REFLECTING to me; but I didn’t have the awareness that I have now to see exactly what I needed at the time, such is life!  So inevitably in my case, my body had to do something more drastic to get my attention and demand that I stop ignoring, pushing, and depleting myself! Hence SVT.

There is much that you can do to help yourself change the direction of your life and health.

That is WHY I am sharing all of this with you. Learning, at any age, what it means to reflect on your experiences and and analyze why are attracting what you are attracting, is an essential part of self-healing. Learning the tools to help create change is available for you and us all at any ange or stage of life.

Learning how to hold space for ourselves and how to deepen our connection to our intuition so that it can guide our life is our birthright and exactly what we are being called to do. I think health issues arise to help us get back on track. Further, learning not only what our hearts desires is one thing, and then learning how to skillfully present those HEART TRUTHS to the world, navigate dysfunctional relationships, set boundaries, walk away from unhealthy relationships or circumstances, is a WHOLE OTHER SKILLSET and necessary part of heart truth communication! WOWzer…

So, if you can begin to see that SVT is not something here to ruin your life but something that is here to help you reclaim your life, the closer you are to being able to over come it. I see SVT as my wake up call. It’s a wakeup call reminding us (forcing us) to re-evalualte the areas of our life that are not in alignment with our Heart truth.

When I re-read my journal pages, I saw a girl that was struggling and needed helping finding that. Today, I can share so many tools to help with this process. I WISH someone gently guided me back then…maybe I wouldn’t have had to suffer for so long, but then again, accepting that everything is in perfect divine order, is the energy that helps us to attract exactly where we need to be.

ESSENTIALS TO FINDING OUR HEART TRUTH…

So, what are some of the things that I would recommend to help you find and speak your heart truth…Here they are….

  • Engaging in Spiritual Practices that strengthen your connection to your Intuition- I think journaling is one of the fastest ways to connect to our intuition. You can also try lighting candles, pulling oracle cards, meditating, dream journaling, vision journaling or anything creative. CREATIVITY is fuel for our intuition.

  • JOURNAL- JOURNALING is one of the greatest tools that can help us connect to our heart truth. There are so many styles of journaling such as release writing, intuitive Q + A, letter writing, affirmation journaling, vision journaling etc. I recently wrote a new FREE e-guide called, “Journaling with your Intuition” to help people re-evaluate thier relationship with thier intuition. You can download my free e-guide HERE.

 

  • Get QUIET- We live in a noisy world. Being endlessly busy and engaged fills up our time and energetic space and can clutter our energy field. Think of ways to slow down, become OK with being quiet. and REST.

  • Space Clearing– Assessing your environment and working hard to space clear is essential. Clear space, clear mind. Clutter, piles, messes, long lists of things to do, is all a part of the cycle we need to break. Just keep working on this and clearing aways as much stiff as possible.

 

  • Consider Vision Journaling, Art Journaling and making Vision Boards. I cannot say enough about how creative and healing it is to allow yourself the time and space to bring to life the VISION that you hold for yourself through imagery and intention. Vision Journaling allows you to put your dreams into an existence structure. A place for them to take their first step toward manifestation. The LAW of ATTRACTION is such a supportive, high vibrational piece to our healing puzzle, and vision is the tool to help you ignite the process. I am so in love with journaling and vision journaling that I have begun to create one of a kind, art journaling, + vision journaling kits. They come with journals, crafting paper, fabrics, trims, affirmations and everything you need to get creative! Browse them HERE

I hope that you enjoy some of these suggestions! Thank you for being here!

All the best,

Laura

xo

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